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After much deliberation involving a vote of confidence in Swindon by Prince Charles who lives in nearby Tetbury, Swindon beat a host of Wiltshire's best towns and villages to take home the title.
It was argued that Swindon best-replicated everything that makes the town British from its outstanding food and drink scene to its outstanding sports clubs with the Swindon Wildcats and Swindon Town FC both receiving incredible support.
Swindon's closest rivals in the battle to be named Wiltshire's capital were Salisbury and Melksham, but both failed to impress when it mattered most.
Salisbury argued that their famous cathedral meant they should be given the new status, however too many pigeons in the city centre went against them.
Melksham stated that their claim to be named Wiltshire's new capital but the long wait that the traffic lights take to change to green saw them marked down.
Of course, if you have read this far then we applaud you for your efforts, but just remember that this is all a bunch of nonsense and Happy April Fool's Day.
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